Today is my last day of the initial round of chemotherapy. I am so blessed that my body has responded well thus far and I have had minimal side effects. My heart rate is a little low, but that’s to be expected–my heart is in Berea, not here.
Today is also Emmy’s preschool graduation. Yeah, I know it’s only preschool, but it is a big milestone in the life of a four-year old. Christi and her parents will attend, thankfully.
One might think that after two deployments to Iraq, missing anniversaries, birthdays, graduations, and other milestones would be routine. In some ways that might be true, but mostly that’s not the case. With each missed event is a memory that I will never have. It’s a memory that the girls will have that doesn’t include me.
But rather than dwell on the losses, I can dream of the future memories that we’ll make. I can dream of the first time Abrie walks and talks. I can dream of the day that Emmy accepts Christ and the day that I give her hand away to her future groom. I can dream of Christi’s and my twentieth anniversary. I can dream of the day that my cancer has been in remission for a month, a year, a decade. I can hope and pray for the day that God, in his wonderful glory, says, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”
When we lost Micah over two years ago, the world seemed as if it were falling apart. Our dreams were crushed. Our hearts were broken. But we were and still are reminded of God’s promises to his people:
“I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten— the great locust and the young locust, the other locusts and the locust swarm — my great army that I sent among you. You will have plenty to eat, until you are full, and you will praise the name of the Lord your God, who has worked wonders for you; never again will my people be shamed. Then you will know that I am in Israel, that I am the Lord your God, and that there is no other; never again will my people be shamed. (Joel 2:25-27 NIV)
The God who made this promise millennia ago is the same yesterday, today, and forever. I can see the promises that He has kept every time that I look into the eyes of my sweet Abrie. And while we still mourn the loss of Micah and the memories that I’m missing today, we have confidence that God will continue to restore what the enemy has taken.
Praying for you Sir-SGT Ashley
Jeff, as I sit here and read your blog I realized what a remarkable man you are and I know how important your family is to you. Please keep that wonderful faith and know that there are a lot of prayers going up for you and your family. This is just a bump in the road sweetie and you can beat this. We love you dearly and will continue to pray for you. See you soon.
Kay Vickers
Thanks, Kay. I appreciate that. Anything good in me is from The Lord above. Can’t wait to get over this “bump” and back to my girls. Thanks for praying for us.
Sir I have been and will continue to pray for you. I admire your stength and spirit while you are going through this. Get well soon. SSG Woods
Sir,
You are in the thoughts and prayers of me and my family.SGT. Powers.