I am halfway done with my radiation treatments. Yesterday afternoon I completed the sixth session, with six more to go. They only administer radiation treatments on weekdays, so that means I won’t finish until next Thursday, December 19, and then will fly home, Lord willing, the following morning. I got the earliest flight available (6:25 am) so that I could get home to my girls as soon as possible.
I’m thankful for the upcoming weekend and a two-day break from the radiation. It’s getting to me. The process is actually called “Proton Therapy” and is the latest generation of radiation treatment. Doctors can more precisely control the dosage and depth of the proton beam into my body, which leads to better outcomes and fewer side effects. When I get proton therapy to my spine, the beam penetrates through my back to front of the spinal column, stopping short of my stomach and other vital organs, hence sparing me nausea and other side effects. I am starting to experience a few, however. My scalp feels like it’s sunburned and my jaw, temples, and brow are all sore.
The treatments take about an hour each and consist of five segments: one for each side of my brain and three for my spine. Before each segment, I am x-rayed to ensure my body is aligned. Then, I have to lie perfectly still. This is harder than you think. It’s similar to having an MRI, except during the first three segments (brain and upper spine) I am wearing a plastic mask with mouthpiece, fastened to the table to ensure I don’t move.
This is my torture device. My face will not itch all day until I don the mask, and then it’s as if there is an unseen tormenter with a feather tickling my nose. The pad under my head isn’t very soft, so after about half an hour my head throbs and I silently scream for relief. Prayer, distraction, counting the bolts in the ceiling, digging my fingernails in my palm, anything to take my mind off the pain and itching in my head until, finally, a reprieve when the mask is removed. But, this still isn’t nearly as bad as a lumbar puncture or bone marrow biopsy. Perspective is a valuable tool.
Despite the inconvenience of the proton therapy and difficulty of being away from my family right now, I am very blessed to be where I am. Five months ago, I had just finished a two-month stay in the hospital and couldn’t even do a push-up. I had lost close to twenty pounds and had trouble climbing the stairs. Today, despite the news of the relapse in early September, I am in remission, can run a mile (albeit, very slowly), do almost fifty push-ups, and have gained back fifteen pounds. This is far from where I was only a year ago, but so much better than when I was at my weakest in June. Again, perspective.
It’s amazing how God designed the human body to heal itself. Doctors, research, technology, and the resilience of our earthly bodies are important, but He is our ultimate Healer and still performs miracles:
That evening many demon-possessed people were brought to Jesus. He cast out the evil spirits with a simple command, and he healed all the sick. This fulfilled the word of the Lord through the prophet Isaiah, who said, “He took our sicknesses and removed our diseases” (Matt. 8:17 NLT)
I attended a service at Lakewood Church last Sunday. This is the large church that is pastored by Joel Osteen; it’s just a few blocks from the hotel. (Many people have differing opinions about large churches and Joel Osteen. My experience, on one Sunday, is that the name of Jesus was glorified). Joel Osteen’s mother, Dodie, was miraculously healed of liver cancer over thirty years ago and has been cancer-free ever since. She is a living example of the miraculous healing that God still does.
As I sat in Lakewood Church, which is the former Compaq Center where the Houston Rockets played, I was amazed as I looked over the congregation. For a moment, I had a better sense of how big our God really is. Thousands of people sat in the arena, each with their own problems, and yet God knows the number of hairs on every head. He loves them incredibly and knows each of them by name. And to think there are over 7 billion people on Earth, each known and loved by our Heavenly Father. A God this big and powerful can certainly heal the very bodies that He created.
Deuteronomy 1:11
May the Lord, the God of your fathers, increase you a thousand-fold more than you are and bless you, just as He has promised you!